South Dakota launched a new ad campaign to combat growing meth use in the state, let’s take a look at some of their ads below:

…..that is quite the attention grabbing slogan huh? I mean I get what they are saying, but this approach? Idkkkkkk about this one chief.

I mean sure the slogan makes you look twice, at first you’re all like “HOLLLLL UP” because you can’t be reading that right, and then you’re all like “OOOOHHHHHH,” but rather than being like “yeah meth sucks” after a second glance, the only thought going through my head is “that’s a fucking weird ad.”

fingers crossed SD solves their Heisenberg problem stat, but again I don’t think this is how they’ll do it.

Jeff Lanham has been living on the roof of his bar in Cincinnati since the Bengals loss to the Arizona Cardinals on 10/6/19. He made a joke bet with friends that if the Bengals lost that day, he would live on the roof until they won a game, and as of today, 11/18/19, they have yet to do so.

Jeff was joking, but his wife Chrissy changed the game when she shared her husband’s pronouncement on live television before the Cardinals game; local station WKRC often does remote hits from Hog Rock’s (Jeff’s bar), so the joke became a reality.

As a man of his word, after the Bengals lost to the Cardinals, Jeff followed through. now entering his second month on the roof, with the Bengals looking worse than when he started, and winter closing in, Jeff might very well die up there.

This blogger hopes he has plenty of blankets, beers and skyline Chili to stay warm as the temperature dips, because Jeff will be up there for a while.

Swish alluded to this previously, but I’ll confirm it for our readers now: back in 1999 I made the worst decision of my life, I chose to become a Bengals fan.

Whether due to my fierce loyalty or my brain being wired incorrectly, I have stuck with this god awful franchise for the last 20 years (while being a born and raised New Englander, which is a story for another time), and this year has pretty much been rock bottom. You see I didn’t think it could get worse after last year, management FINALLY fired Marvin Lewis and things were looking up, a change was finally coming to Cincy, a #NEWDEY is what they called it, BUT BOY OH FUCKING BOY WAS I WRONG. My team currently sits at 0-9, the worst record in the fucking league, the red rifle has been benched, AJ Green still isn’t healthy and despite learning how to catch this year, John Ross is also still not healthy. But hey at least we will have a top pick in the draft next year to sign a franchise QB like LSU stud Joe Burrow right? LOL IT AINT THAT EASY, because Joe Burrow hates Skyline Chili, Cincys most famous food.

You see skyline chili is an acquired taste, as it isn’t really your typical chili, its a cincy style chili, more of a meat sauce than a meal. Cincy chili is sweeter than regular chili, mostly being used as a topping, people put is on coneys/spaghetti and it is a food loved by all in the city. Skyline is the most famous maker of this style chili, and per the above tweet Joe Burrow HATES this cincy staple, which hurts my heart dearly.

To sum it all up, next year will just be more of the same if we draft Burrow, he already hates Cincy and that’s not a great way to start a rebuild. Who knows though, maybe he’s just more of a Goldstar chili guy.

Heidi Van Tessel had just finished lunch with friends and was on her way home when the unthinkable happened: she was pulled out of her car by a homeless man who than proceeded to dump hot diarrhea all over her.

***takes a break from writing to puke***

Heidi got shit all over her on a sunny day in Los Angeles, which is a city in California, the state with the highest population of homeless in the USA. “The poop was falling off of my eyelashes and into me eyes” she told the local Fox News station, and she apparently laid on the ground for sometime before some nice people finally helped her.

Once the police arrived and cleaned some of the poop out of her eyes, the fire department had to be called to help remove her clothes, as there was so much shit on them they were plastered to her body.

***second puke break***

EMTs eventually arrived to take her to the hospital, where they told her they believed her attacker had been saving his poop up for months due to the sheer volume dumped on her. She was then tested for every disease under the sun, something she will have to return every 3 months to do.

So what happened to this SICK FUCK who did this? Well after fleeing the scene, the attacker, a homeless man named Jere Blessings, came back to the scene of crime to watch the aftermath where he was then arrested. The sad part is Jere has schizophrenia, and is not mentally stable, which does not make his actions okay by any means, but certainly sheds a bit more light on his mindset at the time.

LAPD reports crimes like this are not uncommon, as the city’s population of homeless continues to increase rapidly, despite the city throwing hundreds of millions at the problem.

Heidi is still super fucked up about the incident, so the cooler is wishing her luck in somehow overcoming this shitty nightmare.