What do you do when Sunday Scaries go into Monday?!?!?!

So last weekend, in College and NFL I went for a combine 6-28 (3-2 in my Friday Five,) and let me tell you…THAT’S NOT GOOD!

I bet the Colts money line and spread, and it would have been a double winner if the greatest kicker of all time didn’t decide to suck eggs! Instead double L’s.

I had the Lions +2.5….they had the ball on the 1 yard line 4th and goal, and didn’t get it! I had the Packers at LA Chargers where it’s a home game for GB…ARog sucked an egg like Vintarari, another L! I believed if the Browns were gonna turn around the season they would have to beat a backup QB I never heard of, instead Browns sucked like they always do!

The Dolphins who are actively trying to lose, so what my dumb brain thinks “Oh jets aren’t good but they will beat Miami and give that false hope.” By the end of the day somehow the Jets are in a better draft position then Dolphins! HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!?!?

To cap it all off, I thought Bill and the Pats never let young QBs win, so I took the Pats….They got fucking smoked!

I was hoping writing this all out would be some type of cathartic thing and make me feel ok, it has not in fact it makes me feel worse!

TACO BELL: THE FUEL BEHIND PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES

Think Taco Bell is shit? Think all it does is induce diarrhea? Think it’s basically dog food? Well guess what, you have a shit pallet and you are wrong as fffffffuuuuuuccccckkkkk.

During last nights Ravens defense introductions, rather than stating the name of his alma mater, Matthew Judon said “body by Taco Bell.” What an incredible statement to make, Judon is basically confirming that his meals at Taco Bell have done more for his NFL career than his education at Grand Valley State.

I’m sure you’re asking, what does this mean for me? It means if you ever want to achieve your goal of being backup QB on a successful NFL franchise, it’s time to put down the playbook, throw your diploma in the fucking trash (a lot easier if it’s from a D2 school like Grand Valley State) and pickup a Taco 12 pack from your local T-Bell. Also, Jeffery Epstein was murdered.

FUCKKKKK THE KNICKS

Aside from a jawnz enthusiast, your boy is also an angry sportsfan… LEGIT MY ALL TEAMS LOOK LIKE THE LAST SHIT I TOOK. But what stings the most, is that every fucking year James Dolan promises that the Knicks will be back….

This summer was the the last straw… after banning Oakley and refusing to sell the team… you forced us to give you one more fucking chance.

KYRIE AND KD WANT TO PLAY IN THE GARDEN… WE WILL TANK FOR ZION… AND RAISE A BANNER

Lets begin with the off season leading into free agency… we trade THE FUCKING UNICORN FOR A BAG CHIPS! Dennis Smith Jr who we could have drafted instead of Frank whoeverthefuck…. what makes it even worse is that Fisdale is only playing Dennis Smith 10 minutes a night… but it gets worse

Kyrie then changes his mind faster than JR Smith rolls his blunts… He decides to go to Brooklyn and DOLAN DOESN’T EVEN OFFER KD A MAX CONTRACT!!!!!!!!

BUT FUCK IT WE TANKED FOR THE NUMBER 1 PICK…. NOPE WE DRAFT RJ AT 3 AND INVITE HIM TO THE SHITSTORM THAT WE CALL THE NEW YORK KNICKS.

#TANKFORLAMELOBALL

Continue reading “FUCKKKKK THE KNICKS”

The Friday Five!

Last week was tough can not lie. I put many houses on Notre Dame, what I should have done was put all the houses on Kansas St. which I gave out as well. I went 2-3 witch if you only went 1 unit per game you ain’t dead. I’d kill to be only 1 unit down right now.

Saying all that, the Notre Dame Cloud is gone, now all my picks are gonna be with the brain not the heart. 5-0 and my turn around for the season begins Saturday with these five games!

1. Boston College (+3) at Syracuse

BC can run and control the clock, while Syracuse just aren’t good. Give me the points and don’t hate money line even on the road

2. Florida (+6.5) vs Georgia

The biggest cocktail party also has the game of week by FAR! I know MetsFan is sweating bullets with his gators game as the season is on the line. I think this is a great defensive game and just give me the points, because I do not know who is going to win.

3. Oregon (-5.0) at USC

Oregon is really really good. People kind of forget about them being out west and that lost week 1. That lost looks more like a fluke each week, and I think they roll at USC…Oregon big!

4. Arkansas (+7.5) vs Mississippi St.

This game is a strictly a numbers game. Both teams are bad. Mississippi St. shouldn’t be a touchdown favorite against anybody, especially on the road. Give me the points.

5. Utah (-3.0) vs Washington

I know earlier in this very blog I said all these picks are with my brain, HOWEVA (Stephen A. Smith voice) anytime I bet Washington they lose! I’m taking Utah home fuck you Washington you bums!

It’s a tough week for big games, but every game a big game when you betting!

IT’S THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN YALL

It’s time fellas, It’s the month to close up the spawn shop, no more spanks/wanks/cranks, no more yeeting ya meat into open orpheus’s, it’s time to show what you’re made of.

it’ll get tough, it’s a long road between 11/1 and 12/1, but if we stay strong and work together we will get through this.

Whenever your feeling like you’re about to BUST, just take a step back, maybe text the homies, see if they’ll hop on the the servers, play the new COD.

i understand it’ll be hard though (both physically and metaphorically), so to keep you motivated through the fight, I am giving you a a sneak peek of the patches we will hand out to all successful participants:

Godspeed and good luck.

Jimmy G is smooooth

Last night Jimmy G had quite the night with four touchdowns and 300+ passing yards leading his 49ers to 8-0. However it was his postgame performance that stole the show.

That “baby” slid out so smooth, a true QB1 move. These are the intangibles you learn as Brady’s apprentice for 2.5 years. I think Erin Andrews wants some more of that.

Pray for Jarret Stoll, cuz that dude is dead 💀

Lastly, that look back…SO COCKY yet so dreamy

Mystery Links 10/31

Happy Halloween! Now some peeps are lucky and gets out of work early or maybe your work throws a special Halloween happy hour and work is done at 2. These links aren’t for you. These links today are for the peeps who are in THOSE type of offices. Where Judy dresses up like a cat and is annoyed everyone is not dressed up and just want to get to 5! Today is a tough day in the cube when you just want to hide and not talk to anyone. So here are some links to get you to the Halloween 5 o’clock

Mystery Link 1

Mystery Link 2

Mystery Link 3