The internet is full of losers and you can’t replicate speed: PATS GOT CAUGHT AGAIN EDITION

Listen, I hate to beat a dead horse, but the Pats need to cut this shit out. What do they need to cut out? GETTING CAUGHT SO FUCKING EASILY OF COURSE.

Yesterday the Patriots were once again accused of spying on another team in the NFL, this time they were allegedly stealing the 1-12 Cincinnati Bengals play calls via a film crew on the sideline during their clash at the Browns on Sunday. The Pats were quick to deny the allegations stating they were there filming a scout on the road for the upcoming DO YOUR JOB 4 documentary, but also admitted they did film the Bengals sideline. This led to thousands of twitter based NFL insiders to give their HOT AS FUCK takes on the Pats cheating ways. Let’s take a look at some of these very smart and well spoken takes:

Seems to me like a bunch of people are VERY salty of the Patriots success and Pats fans are VERY much okay with this as long as the teams winning, which I cannot blame any of them for. I have 2 very hot takes myself on this matter, let me get into them below:

  1. No matter how many signals you steal, John Ross is just too fucking fast, the type of speed you simply cannot replicate.

I mean I totally understand prepping your defense in the best way possible—by stealing all the play calls of your opposition— but even if you do that against Cincy, you won’t be able to stop John Ross. Stephen Gilmore, arguably the Pats best DB this season, only runs a 4.40 in the 40 yard dash, while John Ross runs a LIGHTNING FUCKING FAST 4.22 across the same distance, meaning Stephen will get toasted all god damn day. Here’s combine footage of Ross running the 40, even if you know his route how are you going to keep up?! You can’t it’s IMPOSSIBLE, smell ya later Stephen.

which brings me to my second take:


thing that’s a lame excuse for a team getting caught cheating? Lol fuck off loser, nice guys finish last and if you aren’t trying to push the rules of the game to their absolute limit, you’re just fine with being average. My opinion, as a Bengals fan, is that New England has been running circles around the rest of the NFL in terms of game strategy for nearly 2 decades now. Bill and das boyz are simply living in the gray area of strategy, tip toeing the line of what’s fair, but this constant process of pushing the rules to the limit has resulted in 6 Super Bowls, so it’s all worth it in the end. New England’s real problem is that they keep getting caught, take this latest Bengals instance for example, a videographer in Bruins gear sat directly in front of a Bengals rep in the press box and proceeded to record Cincys sideline. Bruins gear when you are undercover? Bill needs to get him some better spys, because this lack of effort is 100% not the Patriot way.

Were the Pats cheating? Probably. Does it really matter? Depends on who you ask. Should more teams be like New England? Fuck yes.


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